At some point you’ve probably seen a romance movie or a “chick flick” where someone falls in love during their college experience.
From “The Social Network”, which shows Mark Zuckerberg’s unsuccessful relationship with his college girlfriend, to animated movies like “An Extremely Goofy Movie”, where Goofy joins his son in college and ends up falling in love with someone, it’s heavily romanticized to be in college and have a significant other.
Pursuing higher education has its benefits, such as meeting new people and fun activities, but unlike what the media sometimes shows, many students feel it’s okay to enjoy the whole experience without a significant other and shift your focus to your own fulfillment and growth.
Sophia Loureiro, a fisheries, wildlife and conservation sciences major at Oregon State University, said it’s easier to escape the need to find a partner when you develop a solid friendship base full of love and trust.
“It’s much easier to not feel desperate and search for a fulfilling partnership at one’s own pace if you’re able to get fulfillment in other aspects of your life,” Loureiro said.
This is not to say one won’t feel anything when you see other couples, especially during special holidays. Loureiro says that this is totally okay but to be careful with who you let in your life during your college experience.
“You should just be discerning and take your time when looking for a partner, understand your value and worth and seek out people that are supportive enough to walk alongside you,” Loureiro said.
College can be experienced in its traditional sense on campus or fully online but this doesn’t take away from what you experience as a student.
For Megan McDonald, an OSU Ecampus student majoring in natural resources, the traditional college experience is out of the picture but she said “with college comes its ebbs and flows of relationships anyways.”
McDonald said she didn’t become involved with any relationships in high school so at first she felt she had to be all in for dating but with bad experiences she had and taking the time to learn about herself, dating is just not on her radar.
“Honestly, I think college – no matter your age or what part of life you’re in, as many Ecampus students range in — is such a crucial time for self-discovery,” McDonald said. “For me, I’ve learned a lot about my mental health since 2020 and how to recognize and advocate for my limits and discomfort.”
Similar to Loureiro, Mcdonald also relies on strong friendships as well as hobbies and interests to feel content without a significant other relationship.
“I’ve found more hobbies and interests that fulfill me. I don’t feel rushed or pressured to be ready for something, and I trust that a relationship could come when it’s appropriate in my life and right now, especially with the stress of college, is not that time,” Mcdonald said. “I value the friendships I’ve developed with classmates, and in a way, with myself way more and I’m way more content than I ever felt in the dating scene.”
