Editors note: There has been an update for the correction of spelling for “International Fraternity Council organization”.
New dating norms … What’s up with that?
From hookups to long term relationships, dating culture has many extremes nowadays.
Sexuality is fluid and love actually is optional. College is about making connections, not just raising that body count.
Students have a lot to say on this topic, so let’s make their voices heard.
Why do so many students choose to join Greek life? You may think that it’s for the dating culture but students in the community would beg to differ.
Amalie Landry (she/her), a member of Kappa Alpha Theta Sorority, says “ I think it’d be easier to date if I wasn’t in a sorority.”
Another huge factor that contributes to the dating lives of college students nowadays is queer representation.
Tess Hoffman (she/they) states “As a queer student myself, I always think that campus could have more positive queer representation on campus. I am lucky enough to have found a lot of queer communities on campus which is great!”
Tess is not a member of Greek life, so they have found their community elsewhere which led her to finding lots of positive queer representation.
Now here’s where we get into the nitty gritty. Is there positive queer representation in Greek life?
“I believe that PHC [Pan-Hellenic Council] has a very welcoming environment to all women and individuals that are interested in sorority life” says Landry, “ but inclusivity looks different for different councils.”
Here’s what a member of an International Fraternity Council organization has to say.
“Queer representation in Greek life is certainly growing, but it’s not what it should be. As a queer person, due to the connotations of what frats are, I was extremely trepidatious about joining Greek life. What finally convinced me to join my fraternity was getting to take a long walk and talk to another queer brother. Seeing him be open about his sexuality but still no different than any other brother was extremely relieving.” says Gabe Baker (he/him), a member of Acacia Fraternity.
Hookup culture is found all around campus and does affect students day to day.
“Honestly, I think hookup culture is probably more prevalent in students day to day more than we think and want to admit. To me, hookup culture feels cheap and transactional at times and I think it bleeds into people’s personal relationships and behavior” says Hoffman.
And on a similar note, Baker stated “I doubt that college students as a collective at OSU could reach a maturity level where hookup culture is viable” and claims that hookup culture has a more adverse effect on straight students due to misogyny and perceived power dynamics by gender.
“If you aren’t seeking it out, it’s really easy to miss and for others it can almost take over their lives.” says Landry in regards to hookup culture.
College is about finding yourself. If that is in a relationship, that is great, but at the end of the day, the only thing you are guaranteed is you.
Hoffman said, “I’ve found a lot more happiness and comfort in finding new friends, doing work that I enjoy, and taking classes that I am interested in.”
Finding your community, whether that be in Greek life or elsewhere, is so important.
“To any queer members of Greek life reading this, I hope you feel safe and able to be visible. You might just be the reason another queer person feels safe enough to join,” said Baker.
As relationship dynamics are shifting, people are being more authentic. There are pros and cons of how dating culture is changing. This shift is empowering to women, queer individuals, and even straight men who do not want to fall into a traditional gender role.
